Sunday, February 22, 2015

So I Realized I Should Continue...

Hello all,

    So once I had made it here to LA I debated with myself for awhile on whether or not I would continue with the blog. I'm not particularly a wonderful writer and truthfully I had a lot of what I felt were set backs since I get here to LA and wasn't sure if everyone would want to read about my "hardships" because let's face it, I understand and know I have NOTHING to complain about, I have been so blessed to be able to follow my dreams and have a father and friends who are supportive in me picking up my life and moving for a one in a million shot.

    But it is difficult to do what I did, I picked up and moved across the country to a city I had only visited once and had no one with me. I first got here and had this amazing idea in my head of what LA would be like and how it would go, I never thought it would be an easy thing to do but I really never expected what I got here.

   I knew it would be difficult, starting a life in an unknown city but what I wasn't prepared for was the loneliness, the loneliness comes from being in a big city with people everywhere but you seem to not know anyone. I got to experience a lot of firsts I never thought I would;
       I experienced my first meetup, which is a social site that lets you set up meeting groups of people for things you like, I went to my first meetup at a comedy club hoping to meet people my 3rd day here in LA, I never met any of the people who were supposed to also be coming to the meetup and so I went through a full comedy show by myself, and let me tell you the two alcoholic drinks really helped me get through the night without running out of there because I was the only person by myself. My second meetup experience was also not that great, I wore a wonderful fancy dress and spent hours getting ready to go to a lounge after the SAG awards for a networking event, I got there and after more than an hour of waiting outside in line, I left. And then I experienced another first, I went to the movies alone.
      I never realized how many things I always felt like I needed friends or family to do, but I do challenge anyone out there to do just one thing alone they haven't before, it is a very different experience that I felt like helped me understand more of who I am at a deeper level, cause how many times in your life do you get to be just by yourself.
    Now I'm not going to pretend like I have all this knowledge and am super strong because I've done some things by myself, not even close! I have called my dad crying many, many times. I have thought about coming home more then once and I have thought about loading the car back up and driving right back to Pittsburgh. But that would be giving up on why I came out here, to follow my dreams.

    This past week I started at AMAW, Anthony Meindl's Actors Workshop, one of the best if not the best acting studio in LA (not just my opinion!). I was accepted into their intro class and had my first class this past Tuesday. In all the time I have been out here that was by far the best day ever, I felt so alone and like I was behind the ball starting and getting accepted into this major amazing studio and in the first class I realized how not alone I am, every person in my class was so supportive and everyone was just some of the best people I've ever met. I will be at the studio as much as I possibly can, I love the people and the energy in the studio, it really is indescribable!

    I am looking for a new apartment for April, this time I think I will be moving to West Hollywood area, to be closer to the studio and also the area has a lot younger age range then Brentwood, which seems to be mostly families and older people.So I really think it will help me in making friends, because I haven't been having much luck so far in meeting people.

    Overall, it has been a harder few months here in LA then I expected and I have had days where I just cried and wasn't sure I made the right decision by moving here but I still do believe in myself deep down and I still believe this is the start of a new life with a new dream here, and I still believe I can make a life as an actress and in the entertainment industry. It is gonna be harder then I thought but if this is the hardest part of my journey I know I will persevere and more then survive, I will thrive.